


Zero to Hero

by bardocksheadband



Category: Dragon Ball
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe - Ancient Greek Religion & Lore Fusion, Alternate Universe - Gods & Goddesses, Angst, Battle Scenes, F/M, Femme Fatale, Hercules (1997) References, Hercules inspired, References to Ancient Greek Religion & Lore, Romance, Sexual Content, Smut, War
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-22
Packaged: 2021-03-22 01:01:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,896
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30030621
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bardocksheadband/pseuds/bardocksheadband
Summary: Hercules AU. When God of the Underworld Piccolo discovers that the God of the Sky's son grows up to defeat him, he comes up with a plan to kill the infant. Unbeknownst to him, Kakarot survives as a mortal on Earth and begins training back to godhood under King Kai. Luckily for Piccolo, he's got a femme fatale up his cloak sleeve to lead the hero to his demise. But what happens when she begins to fall for the hero?GoChi, BadaGine, and eventually VegeBul as the story goes on. A mix of Disney, Greek mythos, and original content.
Relationships: Bardock/Gine (Dragon Ball), Chi-Chi/Son Goku (Dragon Ball)
Comments: 22
Kudos: 28





	1. Ancient History

**Author's Note:**

> Here it is! The beginning of a new adventure. I do have to say, this is a little mixture of Disney Hercules and Greek mythos. I find that the Disney version had sweet ideas in it that were much better than the downright disturbing events of ancient history LOL. So, some details may not make sense to my avid Greek mythos fans, but I promise I am putting my heart into this story. 
> 
> No GoChi until the next chapter, but this sets the scene and is some world-building, which is always so important for AUs. Anyway, I hope enjoy <3 You're in for a wild ride. 
> 
> Special thanks to my beta Green_Riot and the artist @xShironek0x on Twitter for giving us a glimpse of what's to come, and the always wonderful @lady_menta for the family picture <3

“What a mess....”

Bardock’s chest heaved as he gazed down upon the new planet. The Icejins were creating chaos every place they stepped. The mortals of Earth were being senselessly murdered, some of them minutes after taking their first breath. 

The God of Sky was growing more and more frustrated by the actions of the self-proclaimed rulers of the new world. Bardock lowered himself down from Mount Vegetasei on a cloud and hovered above the section of land where the Icejin known as Frieza was causing earthquakes, turning the area around him in shambles. 

The mortals who were running as fast as they could froze when they saw the gold being approaching them. Some dropped to their knees and held their hands up in the air for praise. 

“Bardock! Please save us!” 

At the mention of the god’s name, Frieza punched the ground beneath him and sent tremors through the country. The ones who were begging Bardock for help were suddenly burnt to death by the flames that shot through the earth. The god’s hand twitched at the sight of the charred bodies of innocent men, women, and infants. 

“You… demon!” Bardock snarled and shot his arm upward. “You and your bloodline bring nothing but chaos to this world! You don’t deserve to roam freely!”

Frieza offered the god a malicious grin while looking up. His claws were still glowing from the after-effect of his deadly attack. “My dear Bardock… Do you really believe you could defeat the Icejins? We are the original creations. Much stronger than you or others who reside on Vegetasei.” 

Bardock’s lips curled back into a sneer as his veins pulsated on his forehead. The more the Icejin cackled, the angrier the god became. The scent of charred skin filled his flared nostrils and it was enough for a large lightning bolt to form in his hand. 

"I may not be able to kill you,” Bardock’s massive shoulders heaved up and down while speaking through clenched teeth. “But I can sure as hell can paralyze you long enough to lock you up for good.” 

Frieza’s smile completely faded away. The loud growl escaping the god’s mouth reminded him of a beast, and the very sound of it created harsh winds that made Frieza lose his footing. The very moment he was able to find balance again, the lightning bolt struck his entire body. He let out a screech while convulsing on the ground. The tyrant’s eyes twitched madly as he watched the feet of Bardock touch the damaged earth. The god was approaching him with a purpose, and Frieza was unable to escape. His body was numb all over, including his lips that couldn’t speak. 

Bardock lifted the paralyzed Icejin over his shoulder and traveled across the world on his cloud. He growled under his breath, noting the destruction the other Icejins were still inflicting. After containing Frieza somewhere deeper than the Underworld, he would come back for the rest. 

The God of Sky jumped down from his cloud and shook the ground beneath him as he did. He had found the cave that would lead to Styx, the black river of the dead. After wandering through the darkened narrow, Bardock finally reached the wide opening. He shuddered at the moans of the souls trapped in the waters echoing throughout the deep innards of the cave. As soon as he reached the boat, another deity emerged from the shadows.

“What brings you to my side of the universe?” The God of Death chuckled darkly after glancing at the Icejin over Bardock’s shoulder. “Did you bring me a present?” 

Usually the type to play along with the banter, Bardock instead donned a serious expression to match his tone. “Piccolo, I need to lock him and the others in Tartarus. Can you take us there?” 

Piccolo looked Bardock up and down while contemplating. It was true that these Icejin tyrants were destroying the new world and the god’s job was getting overwhelming with all the souls that processed through. But after drawing the shortest stick to rule this depressing place, Piccolo was still resentful when it came to Golden Boy needing assistance. 

"Why does it matter to you what happens to that planet?” 

“You’re not the one witnessing their cruel actions. Please, Piccolo,” Bardock furrowed his dark eyebrows together. “I can’t do it without you.” 

As jealous as Piccolo was of both Bardock, who ruled the sky, and Vegeta, who ruled the sea, there was still the faintest bit of compassion and pity for the gods he knew since their creation. The ruler of the Underworld growled under his breath and motioned silently for Bardock to follow him to the boat. Frieza made a sound when he threw him down. The Icejin remained paraylized in the back while Piccolo rowed and Bardock stood behind him, looking around at the groaning souls who had been lost due to the tyrant. 

Bardock’s gaze traveled to the black clothed back of Piccolo and frowned. He didn’t come to the Underworld very often and for good reason. “This place won’t be so chaotic once I get these bastards away from the world. I’m sorry you have to deal with all of this.”

Piccolo kept his scowl while looking forward. If he really wanted to, he could trick Bardock into going inside Tartarus as well and trapping him forever. He could claim the throne of the sky and have some other poor deity rule Hell. The other occupants of Mount Vegetasei would surely come for him though, particularly Gine, and Piccolo needed to either get stronger or have backup before facing the Queen of the Gods and her cronies. 

The time wasn’t right.

Not yet. 

“It’s fine,” Piccolo spoke as calmly as he could despite his hands wrapping tightly around the shaft of the paddle. “Let’s seal these Icejins in the vault.”

“Thanks, Piccolo. This is really going to save humanity,” Bardock smiled gratefully and couldn’t see the other deity’s wicked grin, suddenly having an idea pop into his head. 

_It won’t for long._

* * *

“What kept you?”

The second that Bardock settled into his throne to hold his throbbing head, his wife had appeared inside the temple. He opened his eyes slowly and straightened up upon seeing her. Although Bulma was the Goddess of Beauty, his queen Gine was the one who never failed to capture his attention. She paused in front of him with her hands on the curved hips of her pink dress, waiting for his response. 

He stood up to meet her in the middle. Without a word or an answer to her worries, Bardock’s large hands started to explore her small frame while kissing her neck. 

"Oh, Bardock,” Gine sighed and brought her head back slightly so he could kiss more of her impenetrable skin. She gripped his shoulders tightly. “Are you going to tell me?” 

“I will once we’re done.” 

At the sound of his gruff voice, Gine pressed her lips against his hard and dug her nails into his wild black hair. Bardock lifted the goddess up by her thighs, knowing she’d instantly wrap those slender legs of hers around his waist. He carried her over to a long white bench in the corner. She already knew what that meant and began to slip out of her dress. Bardock was already out of his toga by the time she turned to face him. Each had a shy smile on their face, always enamored by the naked appearance of one another. 

Whatever he had been through during his trip to Earth, the queen was aware that he needed to blow off some steam. Her finger traced the outline of his well-defined abs and she licked her lips to lubricate the words he really needed to hear. 

“Do whatever you want to do, king.”

A chill ran down Bardock’s spine and he growled low in his throat when they kissed again. He broke it off to bend her over the bench. Gine held onto the edge while Bardock’s fingertips ran lightly down from her shoulder blades to her heart-shaped ass. Holding onto her perfect derriere, his thoughts were running back to all the things that drove her wild. 

After a sudden flash of light had come and gone in the temple, Gine glanced over her shoulder, and her large eyes lit up at the visage of Bardock taking on a new appearance. His chest, inner legs, and cock were bare, but the rest of his body was covered in red fur. His black hair had grown slightly longer, and his eyes glowed yellow. When he opened his mouth to speak, her knees buckled at the peek of his new elongated canines. 

“You don’t know how much I missed your body.”

“Then show me.”

When his full smile revealed his fangs completely, Gine was moaning long before his cock entered her warm entrance. Her beast of a lover held onto the sides of her ass while thrusting in and out of her. He sounded more animal than god, growling loudly. The sound of it was music to her ears, and it increased in volume when he put more of his weight on her. His large biceps wrapped just underneath her breasts while picking up the rhythm of his hips. 

When the tail from his transformation wrapped around her waist to extra security, she threw her head back to moan into his ear. 

“Fuck me harder, and don’t stop!” 

Bardock sank his fangs harshly into her neck, knowing she could handle it. He truly had been missing intimacy with his wife, and normally he would be gentle with her—but not tonight. Not after she’d been on his mind during the entirety of his journey. 

He wanted to _fuck_ her. 

As he slammed his hips into hers, Gine was losing her mind—and he was losing his rhythm. Once he looked down at her bouncing breasts mixed with the sounds of her satisfaction, he couldn’t prolong his climax. His body pulsed and surged while releasing a wave of electricity through Gine’s body. Delicate bolts of lightning danced across her and provided her with her own stimulation overload. She cried out Bardock’s name while experiencing the heartstopping sensation that was quickly followed by an endorphin hit that could relax her like nothing else. 

He held onto her, panting into her ear and managing a smile. “What was your question again?” 

“Where, whew, were you?” 

His tail and arms held onto her still as he brought her backward with him onto the tiles. She was sitting on his lap and he was kissing various parts of her back before resting his chin on her shoulder. “I managed to imprison the Icejins. They won’t be harming the new world any longer.” 

“Wow,” Gine rubbed the forearms wrapped around her up and down. “All by yourself, Mr. Strongman?” 

“Eh,” Bardock switched back to his true form and Gine watched as the tail disappeared. “I got a little assistance from Piccolo and you already know Vegeta doesn’t like anyone messing with his oceans. We stunned them long enough to ensnare them.” 

“You’re not at all worried about them escaping?” 

Bardock inhaled and exhaled deeply while clinging to his wife. She was always worried about one thing or another. She wanted to keep the mortals safe as much as he did. “Not unless someone releases them, and the only ones who know about Tartarus are Vegeta and Piccolo. They’re not serpents. There’s nothing to worry about.” 

Gine decided for once to trust his word. The couple sat on the floor of their temple in content happiness, unaware that Earth’s first hero was forming inside the goddess. 

* * *

“Isn’t he just the most precious thing you’ve ever laid eyes on?”

“He sure is,” Bardock kissed Gine’s cheek while holding her from behind. “Strong little guy, too. He lifted me up with his finger the other day.”

“Oh, I hardly believe he’s _that_ strong to do that to a god such as yourself.”

Bardock slapped her bottom before picking up his son. Kakarot looked every bit just like him, only with his mother’s large eyes. He was his father’s pride and joy. The glowing royal family headed out of their temple in the clouds to where the celebration was taking place. Gods and goddesses from around the universe burst into cheers the moment they saw them. Bardock placed his son in his special crib while the visitors gave their blessings and gifts. When the God of the Sea appeared, Bardock snorted. 

“No gift, Vegeta?”

“Nope,” the flame-haired one retorted while glancing down at the tiny body inside the crib. “Just wanted to see how ugly it was.”

“Excuse me!?”

Vegeta jumped at the sound of both Gine’s and the Goddess of Beauty’s sharp voices. He held his trident tightly while stepping aside for Bulma to get a glimpse of the newborn. The goddess glared at Vegeta after seeing how cute Kakarot was.

“What kind of pig-headed jerk insults a baby!?” When Vegeta turned his head away from her, she grabbed it and whispered in his ear. “If you keep that attitude up, I’m not meeting you in the sand anymore.” 

Bardock didn’t know what Bulma had whispered to him, but he chuckled at the blush on Vegeta’s face as he stammered off. The goddess waved to both of them and disappeared quickly after him, her long blue curls bouncing behind her as she did. From way off in a pillar, Bardock saw the God of the Underworld trying to blend in with all the brightness but failing miserably. 

“Piccolo! Come meet my son!”

The guests moved aside as Piccolo grumbled and walked through the clouds just to get Bardock to shut his loud mouth. It wasn’t long ago that they had traveled to a place deeper than the Underworld to lock up the Icejins together, and now the God of the Sky thought they were best friends. 

“Just stopped by to say ‘hi’ real quick, and then I’m heading back. Some of us have _real_ jobs to do, you know.”

Bardock draped an arm over Piccolo’s shoulder and brought him over to the crib. Kakarot was wide awake now, spitting drool and babbling. The green-skinned deity made a disgusted face seeing him do it. 

“Piccolo, this is Kakarot! Tough as nails already! Try shaking his hand!”

Piccolo rolled his eyes but did so, only to entertain the brute beside him. One handshake, and he’d be getting back to work. He reached his hand toward Kakarot, but then had to conceal a yelp when the baby squeezed tightly. He would have sworn he could hear bones breaking, if it were possible. Gine had to distract him with one of his toys in order to get him to let go. 

Bardock released a roar of laughter while Piccolo was rubbing his injured hand. “See!? You’re probably going to be feeling that the next few days!”

The God of the Underworld turned his back to the couple and meandered back to where the pillars were. He whistled for his death horse to bring him back to Hell, where, as depressing as it was, he didn’t need to put up with this family. There was something about Kakarot that didn’t sit well with him, and he was going to find out exactly what that was. 

Shrugging at the quickness of his visit, Bardock tapped Kakarot’s nose and smirked when he giggled. “Don’t think I forgot about _our_ present. This one’s special. Your very first friend.” 

Gine clasped her hands in even more excitement than their son did as Bardock grabbed a piece of a cloud floating nearby and materialized it into a small baby dragon, greener than the land of Earth. It floated down to the crib and curled up to Kakarot instantly. The infant hugged the dragon and the tiny creature used its small legs to touch him affectionately in return. 

“His name is Shenron,” Bardock rubbed both their heads and felt his heart swell with love and pride. “Perfect companion for my little warrior.” 

* * *

Baba, the Goddess of Fate, hovered over her crystal ball to prevent the God of the Underworld from snooping. 

“I already told ya, nobody’s allowed to see the future except for me!”

Piccolo rolled his eyes. His hand was still aching from the iron grip of the infant Kakarot. The last thing he needed was for Bardock to have a next of kin. “I need to know if that brat of his is going to be any trouble. C’mon. Just imagine how good you’ll have it with me being in control of Mount Vegetasei.”

Baba didn’t want to tell him, but the thought of having somebody else in the Underworld as a leader was what swayed her. She sighed and backed away from her crystal ball to run over the future plan he’d been dreaming of.

“Very well,” she rolled her gray wrinkled hands over the fortune-telling orb and allowed Piccolo room to see what was happening. “In eighteen years, the six outer planets beyond earth will align and allow you to break into Tartarus to free the Icejins. Their strength will be enough for you to take over Mount Vegetasei and dethrone Bardock.”

Piccolo smirked seeing the visage of himself standing over the defeated God of Sky. It was all going to go according to the plan he had devised that day he assisted Bardock in sealing the Icejins away. He was about to thank Baba for letting him see his plan come to fruition, but the sight of a golden speck on the orb coming up from behind the future Piccolo made the god freeze. 

The celestial being, with golden hair and skin, was riding in on a long, green dragon holding a large sword high above his head. The crystal ball faded to black right before the two collided. 

The God of the Underworld stood blinking. “What...the hell was that?” 

“Everything goes according to plan,” Baba snickered from behind her small hands and then fixed her face when Piccolo snarled. “Until the one known as Kakarot puts an end to it.” 

Piccolo released a series of disgruntled noises while Baba quietly slipped away to attend to her threading duties. With his hands clenched tightly into fists, he shouted for his two minions. “OOLONG! PUAR! GET OVER HERE!”

The two bumbling, shapeshifting imps tripped their way down the stairs. They landed at Piccolo’s feet rubbing their heads. 

“What’s wrong, Piccolo?” the one named Oolong rubbed the back of his neck nervously while getting to his feet. He often took on the form of a pig, but nobody knew what his true form was, not even the God of the Underworld himself. “We in trouble again?”

“Whatever it is, it wasn’t me!” Puar, taking on the appearance of a cat, stuck a finger in the air. Piccolo grabbed them both by their necks and placed them atop the rock where the crystal ball just was. 

“No, you idiots! Remember how I told you two about my plan for control of Mount Vegetasei? Bardock’s little son is going to ruin it and I need you two to kill him.” 

Puar and Oolong exchanged a look with one another before raising their eyebrows at their undone ruler. 

“Uh...Boss?” Oolong gulped. “If this is the son of Bardock we’re talkin’ about...Ain’t he a god himself?” 

“Yeah…” Puar joined in, equally nervous and timid. “You know we can’t kill a god.”

Piccolo pinched the bridge of his nose in annoyance and then slid his hand down his face. “I’m well aware. I’m going to create a potion to drain him of all his immortality. Once the baby drinks every last drop, I want you to stab him.” 

Oolong and Puar didn’t bother arguing with Piccolo, knowing it would get them nowhere. They just swallowed back their objections and saluted him. Whoever Bardock’s son was, he must be a big deal to have their god want to murder an innocent baby. 

* * *

“Do you think the dragon saw us?” Puar whispered loudly while working with Oolong to carry the sleeping Kakarot out of the temple. He was tiny, but so very heavy. The bottle of poisoned formula was inside the back pocket of Oolong’s pants as he moved his little feet quickly. 

“Who cares? It’s not like it can talk. Let’s just be thankful gods need rest too and get the hell out of here.” 

They were almost outside the temple when they heard the Queen of Gods screaming loudly. Without wasting another moment, they bolted out to the clouds and jumped off, unsure of where they were going to land but knowing anything was better than facing Bardock and Gine’s wrath. Their anger was creating a wicked thunderstorm. Oolong glanced up at the darkened sky in paranoia while holding Kakarot in his arms, who was just beginning to wake up. Puar held a shaking bottle to his lips and they watched as the golden hue began to disappear from the baby’s skin. 

“Remember,” Oolong continued to cradle Kakarot. “The boss said every last drop.” 

The imps were close to finishing when the sound of horse hooves pounding the ground frightened them. The excited infant smacked the bottle out of their hands and they dropped him before the old traveler noticed they were there. 

After getting off his horse, the old man known as Gohan held his lantern that had miraculously stayed lit outward at the poor baby sitting in the mud. 

“Oh, no… What are you doing out here all by yourself?” 

He frowned and put his lantern down so he could pick the baby up with both hands. He squinted at the shiny medal on his chest that bore the name _Kakarot._ It was one that many sculptures of the gods and goddesses donned, but this baby looked completely ordinary. There was no way he could come from the bloodline of deities. 

Kakarot took one look at the old man’s face and clapped his hands excitedly. It made Gohan smile warmly. He was the sweetest thing he had ever come across. 

“Well, at least you’re a happy baby! I think I’m going to have a hard time with your name, though. Mind if I call you Goku?”

Goku clapped his hands even faster and squealed, letting Gohan know he approved. The old man was about to bend down and retrieve his lantern when he noticed two large serpents showing their venomous fangs. Before he could scream or run, Goku’s chubby little hand reached out and swung one snake at a time over the side of the mountain trail and deep down in a ravine. 

Once they were saved by Goku’s strength, Gohan stretched his arms out and stared at the infant with wide eyes. 

“Wow...Maybe you are the child of a god and goddess after all…” Gohan’s eyes caught sight of the small inkling of blood on Goku’s leg. “Hm… But you’re not immortal. No matter. You were brought here for a reason. I’ll take good care of you. Let’s get you out of this wicked storm and somewhere safe before we get sick.”

High above in the clouds, Gine clung to Bardock’s chest watching their son being taken away in the wagon by the human. Kakarot was mortal now, and couldn’t return to Mount Vegetasei. They were too late and would have to watch him grow up from the sky. 

“Bardock...can’t we go see him?”

“You know our presence will create more havoc than necessary,” Bardock spoke coldly, but his arms were holding on gently to his wife. “That’s Kakarot’s home, now. We can’t do anything to mess that up for him.”

“Is there a way he can come back here?”

“If he can prove himself a true hero on earth, his godhood may be restored. We’ll have to wait and see when he’s old enough. I’ll find a way to speak to him. Let’s just be thankful he retained his strength.” 

Gine sniffed and nestled her cheek against her husband. “Who could’ve possibly done such a thing? Do you think it was Piccolo?” 

“No,” Bardock was firm on his answer. “Piccolo would never betray me like that.” 

* * *

_18 Years Later_

Goku’s favorite part about living on Mount Paozu was his ability to demonstrate his super strength without folks getting mad about it. He could pull trees up from their roots and not be called a freak. He could punch the ground and watch the fish in the river flop upward from the impact without people screaming in fear. 

Grandpa moved him out here around the age of five when he nearly killed another student just by handing him a stone to write with. The overpopulated town even considered murdering Goku, thinking he was a demon child. 

At least out here, even in its loneliness, nobody was around to bully him for his differences. Now somewhat of a man despite his scrawniness, Goku carried the wood logs he had just chopped back to the cottage he and Gohan called home. 

When Goku got close to home, he immediately threw the logs over his shoulder after seeing a horrific sight. 

“GRANDPA!”

Gohan was face down on the ground after fainting from his fever. He had told Goku all morning he wasn’t feeling well, and now Goku was seeing the after-effect. The young man ran to lift him up and brought him inside to his bed as quickly as he could. 

“It’s okay, Grandpa. It’s okay,” Goku tried to keep his voice calm but his heart was racing like mad. The nearest town was an eternity away it seemed and he wouldn’t be able to get him any help. He sat him down on his bed and did whatever he could to make him comfortable. The old man was alive and breathing, but unresponsive, and remained that way for days. 

Goku sat by his side, leaving only to get some water or use the bathroom. He was too sick to his stomach to eat, and it was serious when the young man wasn’t devouring plate after plate. He dropped his head into his hands, waiting exhaustedly for whenever Grandpa would finally wake up. 

“Go...Ku…”

“Grandpa!?” Goku’s eyes shot open, and his vision was blurred by tears. Gohan’s face was gaunt and pale. “How are you feeling? Can I get you anything?” 

Gohan shook his head and reached out a trembling hand for the boy to hold. He smacked his dry lips together and took a minute to find the saliva to form the words. There was a vision he had that had let him know he was reaching the end of his life, and he needed to tell Goku the truth about his strength. 

“There’s a medal...inside the drawer. Can you get it?”

Goku hesitated to leave Gohan’s side but knew by his stern tone he was trying to convey that he needed him to do this. Goku retrieved it and blinked at the word etched in the center. 

“Kakarot? What is this, Grandpa?” 

Gohan closed his eyes tightly, reliving both the dream he’d had and the day he had found Goku. He didn’t fully understand the connection but always knew that Goku was special. “Son... That’s your real name. I saw it around your neck the day I found you.”

Goku frowned while looking at the name once more. Kakarot. Gohan told him he was found as a baby abandoned on the roadside, but he had never been informed of this. “What does it mean? What’s so special about it?” 

Gohan reached his hand out again, and Goku held it with his free one. “It’s the symbol of the Gods. I believe you’re a descendant of the great Bardock, but I’m not entirely sure what happened. You’re not immortal. Someone came to me in my sleep and told me you’re meant to save the world. To be a great hero. The hero you’ve always been to me.”

Goku once more scrunched his eyebrows together while processing his grandpa’s words. It was a great explanation for his strength, but none of it made sense. It sounded like Grandpa was just having another fever dream. He tossed the medal to the ground, believing it had no special merit. 

“Stop saying crazy stuff, Grandpa. We need to get you-”

Goku became paralyzed to the chair and the very breath was sucked from his mouth by terror. Gohan’s eyes had rolled to the back of his head, and his chest wasn’t moving anymore. Feeling his heart pounding in his ears, he opened his mouth to scream, but no sound came out. 

He had just lost the only family member he had, and the only person he loved.

The next few weeks were difficult, and Goku thought he wouldn’t survive the agonizing depression. He buried his grandpa underneath his favorite tree and talked to him every day, wondering if he would ever return. He didn’t pray for his very life to be sold in order to get him back. Gohan warned him plenty of times about making deals with the devil. 

But boy, was it tempting. 

Goku hugged his knees to his chest after coming back inside the quiet home, which didn’t at all feel like it used to. He was about to start crying again when there was a knocking on the door. It wasn’t common to get visitors all the way out here, but Goku had grown desperate for any sort of company. He jumped to his feet and opened the door slowly. 

A blue goat-legged creature that barely reached his knee was standing there, tapping his hoof against the dirt. 

“Kakarot! Boy, do you look sad. Wanna hear a good joke?” 

_Kakarot?_ Goku was beginning to feel uneasy, but the strange visitor ignored his silence and continued. 

“Why didn’t the egg want to hatch?” 

“...”

“Because egg-sistence is a nightmare! Ha! Get it!?” 

“Do I know you?”

The goat-legged creature stopped laughing at his own pun when he realized Kakarot wasn’t too enthralled. He cleared his throat and bowed to him as he spoke. “I’m King Kai, at your service. I’ll be your trainer, assigned by your parents themselves. Oh! That reminds me! We need to head to my island so you have a chance to talk to them. Geez, are they gonna be happy!”

* * *

A young couple sat arm-in-arm in their horse-drawn wagon as it rocked back and forth up the steep cliff. They were so focused on the excitement of traveling to a new town that they weren’t frightened by the small rocks dropping down from up above. 

“Oh, Yamcha! Do you think it’s going to be as beautiful as people say?” 

The scarred man glanced at his girlfriend and grinned. “Not as beautiful as you, Chi-Chi.” 

The young woman kissed his cheek and snuggled as closely as she could to him. They had been together for almost two years now, and she was fairly certain this town was where he was going to propose to her. 

She was about to tell him that she loved him when a loud, grumbling sound erupted from high above their heads. The horses neighed and whined, pausing and refusing to go any further after being frightened by the noise. The couple glanced up to see that a large boulder from the mountains that surrounded their path were beginning to loosen up. 

It was a rockslide. 

“Yamcha!” Chi-Chi cried out and clung tightly to his arm. “You have to get the horses to move!”

“I’m trying, I’m trying!” 

Chi-Chi switched her eyes frantically between her boyfriend whipping the horses to forcibly move them and the boulder that was beginning its tumble downward. “We aren’t going to make it! We have to jump!” 

Hearing the noise growing louder, Yamcha could now see that there wasn’t enough time. They were about to be crushed to death. The man shoved Chi-Chi out of the wagon with his strong arm and sent her tumbling out the side. Her back was pressed flat against the mountainside at the same moment the boulder made an impact. She caught Yamcha mouthing ‘I love you’ to her before he, and the wagon, were crushed underneath. 

“YAMCHA!” 

Chi-Chi limped back to the sight of destruction as quickly as she could manage and fell to her knees. Her lover’s arm was outstretched and unmoving, bloodied and crushed to the point of no return. Chi-Chi held in her breath and tears while holding his wrist, feeling no sign of life. 

For a while, Chi-Chi felt nothing staring at what remained of Yamcha. There was nothing in her brain, nothing in her stomach, nothing in her chest. Rain had started to fall. The God of the Sky and his wife must be weeping again. 

As soon as she felt the first of Bardock’s tears hit her already cold skin, Chi-Chi released the saddest sound that one could hear. It was a mixture of pain, fear, and emptiness. It started off quiet, and then she roared it with her head thrown back. 

“SOMEBODY! ANYBODY! HELP!”

She didn’t know how anyone could possibly help, but she didn’t care. She kept wailing out for someone to help her while holding Yamcha’s hand. His blood had seeped all the way to where her knees were and they were becoming drenched in it. 

“Please…” Her voice was growing weaker as her throat was aching. “Please...I’d sell my soul just to have him back…”

“ _That_ can be arranged.”

Chi-Chi screamed and flipped herself over to see a green-skinned being dressed in a black cloak standing behind her. Even with his hood on, she could make out sharp fangs and glowing red eyes. He stuck a long finger up and motioned for her to come towards him. Against her own will, she found herself doing what he wanted. Her body was in a trance even if her mind wasn’t. 

“Are you...the devil?” Her lip quivered at the word, and it didn’t help that the rain had already made her shiver all over. The deity before her stood several feet above her, making her feel even more tiny and insignificant. He chuckled darkly and placed the same finger he had been holding up underneath her chin. 

“I go by many names, but either one can get you what you want. I can bring the love of your life back on one condition.” 

Chi-Chi swallowed hard, the lump in her throat aching even more than before. She had heard many tales of humans who did dealings with the God of the Underworld, and it never turned out good. All it took was one backward glance at Yamcha’s arms to give her voice the strength it needed. 

“What’s that?” 

“Your soul belongs to me.” 

“I’ll do whatever it takes to bring him back to me.”

Piccolo removed his hand from under her chin and struck it out for her to shake, making it official. Once Chi-Chi did, she closed her eyes and expected something to happen to her. When nothing felt any different, she opened one eye. 

“...Did you do anything?” 

“It doesn’t work like that,” Piccolo rolled his eyes and released her hand. “You mortals really need to do better research before writing those scriptures. Continue on to your destination and you’ll be visited with a pleasant surprise.” 

Chi-Chi looked over her shoulder to see Yamcha’s body was still there. When she turned to face Piccolo once more, the deity had vanished into thin air. With no wagon or horse to guide her, Chi-Chi took a deep breath and trudged through the muddy road in hopes that what she had just done would pay off. 

* * *

A few weeks and a tattered dress later, Chi-Chi had finally reached the town. She was given directions by a kind elderly couple who were the only ones who didn’t believe she was a vagrant and went to the stone cottage where Yamcha had promised they’d start their new life. 

When she arrived, she entered through the doorway slowly and expected to find her love waiting there. Upon seeing nothing but emptiness, she slid to the dirt floor and held her aching head in her hands. 

She was exhausted, hungry, and still alone in her heartbreak. 

“Chi-Chi?”

She remained frozen in spite of her heart beating rapidly. The young woman was unsure if she was delirious or if the voice she was hearing was really coming from someone in the room with her. Once she felt his touch on her shoulder, her head shot up and her eyes instantly filled with tears. Her Yamcha was standing before her, just as perfect as he was before. 

He laughed when she brought him backward with her tight hold around his neck. She was sobbing into his chest as he rubbed her back. 

“Man, I had the weirdest dream last night. I was swimming in darkness until someone pulled me out. I’m glad to see everything is normal here at home, though! Well, almost everything,” he chuckled again when she pulled her head up to look at him with a bewildered expression. “Why are you acting like I've gone to war and just returned?” 

“Oh, honey… You don’t remember what happened the night of the rock slide?” 

“Rockslide?” 

Chi-Chi blinked her eyes at his completely clueless tone. Whatever the devil had done, it erased his memory of his own death. She looked at him a second time, only now through a different lens. Everything about him seemed as normal as before, right down to the sweet dimple in his smile that was hidden underneath the scar. She shrugged her shoulders and kissed him lovingly on the lips while holding his face. 

“Nevermind. I guess I had a strange dream of my own.” 

* * *

As the month went on, Chi-Chi couldn’t help but notice the wandering eye that Yamcha had developed in this town. Granted, back at home, she was a princess and the most beautiful woman in the land. In this new place, there were beautiful dames who made her a mixture of nervous and jealous. 

One day, she was purchasing a new vase for their home. She turned to Yamcha, who was the keeper of the coins. 

“Yamcha,” she whispered while his eyes were on the shopkeeper’s daughter who was giving him the same look of desire. “He’s waiting.” 

“Huh? Oh, yeah! Here ya go.” 

Chi-Chi frowned at the small bag that was jutted towards her haphazardly. When they were away from the fair-haired woman, Yamcha held her hand tightly and acted like nothing had happened at all. Unsure if she had just imagined it all and not wanting to look envious, Chi-Chi decided to let it slide. 

Everything continued on as it normally would, except Yamcha was returning from the fields later and later each day. He would kiss her less and the love-making was infrequent. Chi-Chi just bit her tongue and pretended that everything was fine. She had everything a woman could ever hope for. 

At least she thought she did. 

One day, Yamcha surprised her by being home early. She had returned from a trip from the marketplace and nearly dropped her goods seeing him sitting at the table. 

“Yamcha! What in the world are you doing here!?”

“We need to talk, Chi.”

Chi-Chi hesitated to put the supplies on the table, not liking the way he sounded. She put on a brave face and smoothed her dress down before sitting. She reached out to hold his hand but he moved it out of the way to put in his lap.

“What’s wrong?” She felt nauseous all over and felt her legs were shaking rapidly underneath the table. He wasn’t even looking her in the eyes as he spoke. 

“You need to find somewhere else to go. This isn’t working out.”

Chi-Chi knitted her thin eyebrows together, trying to make sense of the words coming out of his mouth. None of it made sense. “Honey, I-”

“There’s somebody else, Chi. I’m going to marry her.” 

The dark-haired woman stared at the vase on the center of the table while trying to control her breathing. She had long suspected that Yamcha was seeing somebody else, but didn’t want to admit it. Even now, being told the truth at last, Chi-Chi found herself once again not feeling anything inside of her as when tragedy had first struck. She had to leave before her emotions would show. 

She got up slowly and once more adjusted her clothing before pushing her chair in. She held back her tears and remained stoic while packing her bag with what she could fill it with. She touched the door handle but looked back at her former lover to see if he was going to say anything. He offered her a small smile and then looked back down at his hands. 

Chi-Chi closed the door behind her and managed to get through the barrage of trees before finally breaking down. She dropped everything she had, including herself, to the grass and cried her lungs out until she was dry heaving on all fours. After vomiting, she fell to her side and held herself in a fetal position until the sun disappeared.

She had nowhere to go, and nobody that cared. 

“I thought you were different.” 

It was _that_ voice again.

Chi-Chi was so defeated by her suffering that she didn’t move. She just stared through half-open eyes at the ends of the black cloak that covered his feet. “Did you cause this to happen?” 

“Don’t be ridiculous. You gave me what I wanted. Whatever that bastard did was all his own sinful doing.” 

The woman pulled her knees closer to her chest. Knowing Yamcha wanted someone else on his own free will made her ache even worse. She had sold her soul to give the one she loved another chance at life, and this is how he paid her back. 

“Come with me. I want to show you what he’s doing while you’re here looking like a sad sack of flesh and bone.”

As it happened before, Chi-Chi’s body was getting up and following her new master. Most mortals, even when they weren’t in the right headspace, would head for the hills instead of allowing the devil to guide them. Poor Chi-Chi didn’t have a choice and she knew it. 

There was a burning sensation in the pit of her stomach when they came across her former home. It hadn’t been a full twenty four hours yet and she was witnessing Yamcha rushing that blonde woman from the shop inside, their arms full of her belongings. 

“Hurts, doesn’t it?”

Chi-Chi glared up at Piccolo who was already staring at her. “I don’t want to be here anymore! Take me back!”

“Not yet. Go see what they’re doing.”

The woman opened her mouth to scream in protest, not wanting to witness what was happening inside her home, but Piccolo closed it with his cold hand and dragged her forward. They paused in front of the window where the two inside the house were beginning to remove their clothing. Piccolo released her once he knew she was done screaming. She was transfixed on the heartbreak of seeing Yamcha’s hands running up and down another woman’s bare back. The God of the Underworld smirked sensing the rage building up to a boiling point. He cleared his throat and she turned around slowly to see him holding a sharp dagger. 

“Kill him.”

Chi-Chi took the dagger from him and stared at it silently. She had never killed anything or anyone before, and she was terrified that the devil was going to make her do it. She was angry at Yamcha and was beginning to feel hatred brewing within her. She had been taken advantage of her entire life because of her kind-hearted nature. She wanted to get even somehow, to make people—and specifically men—pay for what they had done to her, but murder? 

“You know you want to.”

Chi-Chi shook her head wildly while feeling the heat of Piccolo’s voice in her ear. Tears ran down her face as she finally threw the knife down onto the damp grass. “I can’t,” she sniffed while turning around to face him. “I can’t do it.”

Piccolo scoffed and backed away from her to provide some space between them. The sounds of ecstasy were now even louder thanks to the quietness between the two outside the house. “So yet again you’re saving the life of a man who clearly loves to screw you over? You’re even more pathetic than I thought.” 

The woman took a ragged breath while her eyes drifted down to the knife once more. Yamcha had completely broken her trust and heart, but he didn’t deserve to die. Not by her hands, or the hands of another. She was beginning to realize now that perhaps that night of the rock slide, she had gotten in the way of divine fate by begging for his life back. Whatever was to happen to her, she accepted it. 

“I don’t want to be pathetic anymore.” 

“You won’t be when I’m through with you.” 

Chi-Chi rubbed her arm up and down while Piccolo’s eyes continued to glow crimson. “Am I going to stay in the Underworld?” 

Piccolo laughed cruelly and struck his large hand on her thin shoulder, gripping it tightly to keep her in place to listen carefully. “Don’t be a fool, girl. No mortals can survive a trip to the Underworld. You’ll stay just outside of Thebes. We can toughen you up out there. I’ll mold you into the perfect minion.” 

Chi-Chi didn’t like the sound of that at all, but she had no choice. She was homeless with nobody to love her or vice versa. She glanced back at the home she once shared with Yamcha before taking the God of the Underworld’s hand, swearing to herself that she’d never fall for anyone ever again. 


	2. He Was a No One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to my beta Green_Riot as per usual. <3

Goku stared at the back of the teal satyr's head while rowing the boat across the ocean to the small green island up ahead. His thin arms would've been aching if he were a regular human boy, which apparently he wasn't. King Kai had told him the same story Grandpa had, one about being a descendent of gods. Even while clinging to the medal that was evidence, Goku still didn't believe any of it.

And yet, here he was on a boat willingly rowing to a place where he'd supposedly be able to speak to Bardock. That's right, Bardock. God of the Sky. Savior of mankind. O' Mighty Smiter.

The young man had been alone for so long that he decided to play along with King Kai's little story, and only because it aligned so perfectly with what he had heard before. Once they hit the shore and Goku dragged the boat far into the sand so the tides wouldn't take it away, King Kai was already up on a pillar whistling for him to hurry up.

"C'mon, kid! The temple is this way!"

Goku paused to look around the small island. There wasn't much save green grass, a few trees with some monkeys, little crickets hopping around, and the boat they came in on. There were some pillars such as the one King Kai was standing on that used to have statue heads on them. The pillars themselves varied in size, but the largest object on the island was the temple King Kai was talking about.

The duo stopped in front of the entrance and Goku looked down at the goat-legged being.

"Do I just walk in or something?"

"Head straight on through to the back and into the garden. All your answers lay waiting there."

Goku was a little uneasy but knew if this little goat-man was up to anything malicious he'd be able to handle himself. He took in a deep breath and inhaled the scent of the ocean breeze before going inside the large white building. An eerie sense that something was out of place caused the fine hairs on his arms to stand up as he walked slowly to the garden. He stood in the entryway to admire the bushes that were trimmed into different shapes. He wondered if King Kai had somehow managed to do them himself. His eyes roamed to the variety of statues of different gods and goddesses whom humans had been worshipping for eons.

He strolled gently around, as quiet as could be, and stopped in front of the statue of Vegeta. The God of the Sea was holding his trident proudly in the statue, but Goku couldn't help laughing. It wasn't very nice that the sculptors got the size wrong. There was no way a god could be _that_ short.

"Huh?"

Seemingly out of nowhere, the medal around Goku's neck started glowing brighter than before. He glanced down at it and then to the open sky above him when he could see the reflection in the gold of a moving cloud.

As the cloud approached the ground, Goku's heart was racing. Only a few feet above him stood the King and Queen of Gods. Both of them were illuminated in a golden aura that only got stronger when they stepped down from the cloud they rode in on. Now that he was witnessing Bardock in person, there was no denying that Goku bore an extremely similar appearance to the god. Their messy black spikes and face were the same, but whereas Bardock was mighty and muscular, Goku was frail and scrawny.

The queen got ahead of Bardock and wrapped her arms tightly around Goku, and he didn't know what to do. He kept his arms to his sides while staring down at her crown.

"Oh, Kakarot. You don't know how long I've been waiting to hold you again."

Goku blinked at hearing that odd name once more. He truly must be this Kakarot person, and the one holding him was his...

"Mom?"

The goddess looked up at him with watery eyes. She nodded her head and moved her hands up to hold his face. "My sweet boy... I've missed you so much."

Goku couldn't explain why, but her touch felt overwhelming, all-encompassing, and full of unconditional love. His eyes, the same shapes as hers, were now equally teary. Somehow he had felt this before but couldn't remember where or when. Goku shifted his gaze to Bardock who placed a large, strong hand on his shoulder once Gine had let go.

"I'm sorry about your human falling ill, but you don't know how grateful I am that your time has come."

Feeling a little starstruck, Goku's lips were failing to speak the words that were on the tip of his tongue. The God of the Sky, in all his bearded glory, was holding onto _his_ shoulder. Giving _him_ that look of pride. He moved backward to be set free and then dropped down on his knees to bow to the most admired hero of ancient history.

"Oh great and powerful Bardock who watches over us, hallowed be thy name-"

"For crying out loud!" Bardock rolled his eyes and his thunderous voice interrupted Goku's prayer. "Stand up, son. You're embarrassing me in front of the statues."

After hearing the word 'son' come from the lips of the deity Goku studied the most when enrolled in school briefly, he rose to his feet and stood as tall as he possibly could. The golden aura that surrounded him was causing a slight burning sensation on the son's penetrable skin. Bardock didn't have to do a damn thing for Goku to know how truly strong he was.

"Sorry, Bardock, sir-"

"I'm your father, Kakarot. You may address me as such."

"Okay, uh, _father_ ," Goku blinked. That term sounded so foreign coming from him. "I'm sorry, but I still don't understand how this is all happening right now. Grandpa Gohan said he found me on a road when I was a baby. How did I get there?"

"Someone stole you from us," Gine spoke up before Bardock could, and her face was as serious as her tone. "They took your godhood from you and left you a mortal. You couldn't return to Mount Vegetasei so we left you in the arms of that sweet old man."

Goku looked between his parents, who kept their eyes solely on him. He was definitely left in good hands over the years and didn't regret being raised by the best man there ever was, but it bothered him that his strength could've been explained sooner. "How come you guys haven't talked to me until now?"

"The time wasn't right," Bardock's voice commanded his son's full attention like it did anyone who heard it. "We wanted to give you as many years to grow up on this planet as necessary. When we saw that your human passed away, we knew you needed us. That's why I sent King Kai to you. He's also going to be your trainer."

"My trainer for what?"

"To be a god again. He's going to get you started, but you'll need to be the one to save Earth."

"From what!?" Goku gripped his hair with both hands. It seemed that each sentence his father spoke, the more questions and uncertainty Goku had. "Is something terrible going to happen!? I don't think I'm ready for that, Pops!"

"Pops?" Bardock tilted his head to the side while Gine took her son's hands again to remove them from his aching head.

"Listen to me, Kakarot. Even with the horrible Icejins sealed away for good, this planet is still full of tragedy and disaster. There's evil all around. We asked the God of Wisdom, Whis, what needed to be done for you to return to Mount Vegetasei and he said you need to complete twelve tasks. Twelve acts of bravery, courage, and strength. I believe in you, my little warrior."

Goku searched Gine's eyes for the truth and began to feel something new rising from deep within. All his life he had been told that his unnatural strength was a burden by everyone but his grandpa, and now he was finally seeing a purpose for it. He had the chance to become a hero and prove that he indeed was something special and not just a freak.

"What do you say, son?" Bardock grinned when he caught that fire in Goku's eyes. "Are you willing to go the distance and become the greatest hero that ever lived?"

Mount Vegetesei help him, Goku found himself nodding his head slowly. His inner voice was telling him that this was where he was meant to be. "I'm willing and ready."

Bardock pounded him on the back while Gine let go of his hands to clap her own together excitedly. "You won't have to do it alone either, Kakarot."

Before Goku could ask him what he meant by that, Bardock held his fingers to his lips to whistle up at the sky. A green dragon emerged from behind the crowds and flew to the garden. It picked up its pace once it recognized Goku down below. It made noises of excitement while flying in circles around the soon-to-be-hero. Goku laughed when it stopped to rub its large head against his own, nearly knocking him over.

"Whoa! Who's this handsome dragon?"

"You don't remember?" Bardock chuckled. "He was your first friend. Shenron. He's grown quite a bit since you were gone."

Quite a bit was an understatement. Shenron had to be at least fifteen feet in length. Goku didn't remember him, but Shenron sure remembered him. The dragon wouldn't stop trying to play. Goku scratched Shenron's head while facing his parents.

"Is he the only help I can get?"

"Unfortunately. But we'll always be in the sky watching over you. You also have eyes in the ocean and down below, if you so choose to call on them. However, every task you accomplish needs to be your own doing. We're all rooting for you, Kakarot."

Goku smiled at his father, still in shock that he was Bardock's son. "Thanks, Pops. I won't let you down. I'll be a hero of fame and-"

Gine interrupted her son with the wagging of a finger. "Mm-mm, Kakarot. Being famous isn't the same as being a true hero. Don't mistake attention for heroism. It's not about the applause, it's about the heart. Don't ever forget your most powerful weapon."

Goku took in a deep breath, absorbing his mother's wisdom to the fullest. What she said had to be the gospel truth, because Bardock was a name recognized all over the globe and he was as gracious as they come. He decided right then and there that he wanted to be just like him, and without a second thought, he wrapped his arms around his parents to pull them into a group hug.

"I'll be coming home soon, guys. I promise."

* * *

"Darn it, kid! You're still too slow!"

Goku held onto his knees panting heavily while King Kai shook his head at the time on his stopwatch. "I'm tryin', I'm tryin'!"

"Not good enough," the satyr grumbled underneath his breath. If Goku was even going to stand a chance at accomplishing his first heroic deed, he needed to have the speed that was as great as his strength. King Kai was beginning to run out of ideas until the sound of Shenron whining beside him started to make his metaphorical wheels turn. "Hey green bean, do you breathe fire?"

As soon as Goku wiped his sweaty palms on the end of his toga, he glanced over his back to see Shenron flying towards him. He grinned exhaustively. "Aw! I can't play right now, buddy, I'm in the middle of training!"

Shenron kept coming towards him, now at a rapid speed. The dragon opened his mouth and the flames escaping from it caused Goku to gulp. King Kai chuckled at the sounds of his screams as the hero-in-training was being chased around the island. When his blur passed the satyr, he checked the time on his stopwatch.

"Alright! Your new personal best!"

"MY BUTT'S ON FIRE, KING KAI!"

"There's a whole ocean around ya! Use it!"

* * *

Goku glared at the teal-skinned being wearing a dress on the final pillar of the island. If Shenron got to the damsel first, he'd lose yet another round. Goku was finding out quickly just how much he hated losing. They had been at this all day, with Goku having to start over and over again after losing his balance.

"Remember Kakarot," King Kai called from where he stood and waved. "Keep your focal point on me! Pretend that your little dragon friend is going to eat me for real!"

Goku blew wind up to his bangs and glanced at Shenron who blew steam out of his nostrils, accepting the challenge. At the sound of King Kai's distress call, the challengers took off. Taking King Kai's advice to heart, Goku kept his eyes on him instead of where his sandals were landing. He hopped from pillar to pillar at a rapid speed, shocking Shenron who was moving his wings as fast as he could. Goku's eyes lit up in delight as he wrapped King Kai up in his arms and cheered.

"Woohoo! I did it! I did it!"

"KAKAROT! WATCH YOUR-"

The two fell into the water together and were blown out harshly by an unseen force. King Kai's small body rested on top of Goku's growing chest while spitting up seaweed.

"I think the God of the Sea is getting sick of us."

"I'm beginning to think so too," Goku broke out into a fit of laughter while feeling the fish that was inside his sandal tickling him. King Kai grabbed it by the tail and tossed it back into the water.

"I gave you your fish back, Vegeta! Now spit up that dress! I'm going to need it again!" When there was nothing, King Kai narrowed his eyes and whispered to Goku. "I bet he's going to give it to the Goddess of Beauty."

"He's got something going on with Bulma?" Goku gasped. The gossip about the deities was nothing like he learned in school or from Gohan. "What else is going on with Vegeta?"

"Well-"

Out of nowhere, the drenched dress shot up from under the water and landed on the island. King Kai snickered into his hands.

"Works every time."

* * *

King Kai whistled lowly while looking Goku up and down.

"Kakarot, if you're not statue material, I don't know who is! You look great!"

Goku _felt_ great, too. He flexed his large muscles while looking into the mirror inside the temple. He could now see a man that could never be mistaken for anyone other than Bardock's son. He had ditched his tattered old toga for brown warrior armor gear. His broadened shoulders had a light blue cape draped over them. With his large biceps and thickened neck, he was the pinnacle of physical perfection.

"I've got one more gift for ya."

"Hm?" Goku turned around to see King Kai holding personalized versions of the sword and shield he had been training for months with. He took them excitedly and admired them while speaking to the creature he owed everything to. "Thanks, King Kai! I can't believe I'm about to be a hero!"

"You're definitely ready," King Kai sighed and motioned for the warrior to follow him to the garden. "Let's go show your parents."

Goku held in his breath the moment they stepped into the sacred area, now feeling nervous about what Bardock and Gine would think. King Kai whistled for them and the cloud was lowering down to Earth within seconds. Even in the middle of the night, his parents were waiting eagerly for the transformation of their son. Gine was already crying before getting off the cloud.

"Look at you, Kakarot!" The Queen of the Gods gasped and held her hands to her face. "You're like a work of art!"

"Nah," King Kai chuckled and looked up at his one last hope to prove he wasn't just a creature of mockery. "He's a work of heart."

Goku looked at Bardock who had been silent for a while, and now the son could see it was because the god was too busy beaming with pride at him. The father hugged him once, quick and tightly, and pumped a mighty fist in the air.

"That's what I'm talking about, Kakarot! I knew you had it within you all along!" Bardock turned to King Kai while maintaining his large grin. "Where are you two heading first?"

"Ugh, Thebes," King Kai shuddered at the thought but knew it was the only place close by that needed a lot of saving. "We're leaving first thing in the morning. Mortals need rest, you know?"

Gine got up on her tiptoes and kissed Goku lovingly on the cheek, then rubbed the spot she touched. "Don't be afraid to call out to us if you need help, okay? We'll be watching you the entire time."

"But try not to," Bardock interjected and earned a scowl from his wife. He raised his hands in front of his face in defense. "What? It won't be _his_ heroic deed if we step in."

"Don't worry Mom," Goku winked to calm her worries. "I'm not going to let anyone or anything stop me from becoming a god again. You'll see."

* * *

"Get your filthy hands off me!"

Goku paused at the riverbank listening to the calls of a damsel in distress. He had only landed here to get a drink before heading to Thebes, but now he was looking down at King Kai with wide eyes. The satyr gave him the go-ahead with a thumbs up and Goku waded through the still river to find out where the woman's voice was coming from. Once he came around a bend, he saw a giant with shaggy hair on his head and body. He was wearing nothing but black underwear and releasing his toxic body odor in the air. In his arms was a beautiful woman struggling to get loose.

The two of them turned their heads when they heard Goku splashing the water everywhere while running. He was holding in his breath and sent a strong fist through the gut of the beast, causing him to drop the damsel in the water before falling. Goku was bouncing on his feet and continuing to send water in all directions as the unkempt giant got back on his feet.

"Hey! Just what do you think you're doing!?"

Goku glanced away from the giant momentarily to see the soaked woman ringing the water out of her soaked ponytail. Her purple dress clung to her entire body, outlining it to leave little to the imagination. His eyes drifted up from her heaving chest to her scowling face.

"Uh...Aren't you a damsel in distress?"

"Oh, so you think every girl having a scuffle is a damsel in distress?" She arched a thin eyebrow while placing a hand on her curvy hip. "Move aside, Wonderboy. I can handle this myself."

Goku scrunched his brows together. She couldn't be serious? "It seemed like that beast was the one handling you if we're being honest here."

The woman was about to give him a piece of her mind when the bottom of the river started to shake. They looked in the direction of where the hairy giant was last seen. He was now charging towards them with slobber escaping his mouth. Moving too fast for the woman, Goku beat her to the literal punch. This time, his fist connected with the giant's jaw and sent him flying out of the water and clear over a distant mountain. Goku smirked at the sight of him disappearing.

The hero didn't even break a sweat.

Goku looked at the woman again, whose jaw had completely dropped. He had the nerve to wink at her.

"Looks like I just completed my first task. Maybe I should just follow you around, huh?"

He was circling around her like a shark, but there wasn't anything malicious about him. The woman didn't even know what the hell he was talking about. She was just pissed he got in the way of her own assignment. "Where'd you come from anyway, Wonderboy? The sky?"

"Yeah!" He paused directly in front of her and grinned. "On my dragon! Wanna see him?"

"See your dragon?" It wasn't the first time she heard that one before. She balled up her fist, prepared to punch him in the handsome face when he whistled loudly. She gaped at the green creature who suddenly appeared in the sky, moving around in circles. "Oh. You have an actual dragon."

"What did you think I meant?"

"Nothing," she waved him off and somehow managed to conceal her blush. She turned her back to him to leave. "Anyway, thanks for nothing Wonderboy."

Goku reached out to touch her wet shoulder and frowned when she winced at his touch. He had control over his strength now and thought he was being gentle with her. Either he wasn't or she had been touched roughly before. "S-Sorry. I just wanted to tell you my name isn't Wonderboy. It's Kakarot, but I like being called Goku. I would love to know your name."

The woman, being the untrusting type, fought against his sweet voice and puppy dog eyes despite her heart fluttering. No sane woman would turn this hunk of a man down, but she was a little on the crazy side. "I really have to go, but it's been a real pleasure _Goku_. Bye-bye now."

Goku's frown turned into a hopeless smile as she ran her fingertips down his bare arm before leaving. He caught her glancing over her shoulder at him and he held onto his chest at the sensation going off deep inside when their eyes connected one last time.

"Kakarot!" King Kai shouted from the riverbank after watching the woman disappear into the forest around them. "Great job, pal! Let's get a move on to Thebes!"

The satyr could feel himself growing sweaty when he caught the lovesick look in the hero's eyes. Even when he snapped his fingers, Goku's attention remained on the woman's backside.

"Oh, crap..."

  
  



	3. Honey, We Can See Right Through You

"Ugh, what's _wrong_ with me?"

Once Chi-Chi was far enough away from the strange man that had gotten in her way, she plopped down on a rock and continued wringing out her wet hair. Her sandals were soggy and she'd need to ask Piccolo to materialize some new ones after that soak in the river that should've never happened in the first place. What was annoying her the most was this unshakable feeling of attraction for that Wonderboy she had just experienced.

Ever since Yamcha's betrayal, Chi-Chi's heart had become cold and her guard went up. It had been a long time since she was left speechless or motionless by anyone. Trying very hard to ignore the fact this Goku person had the physique of wet dreams, she chalked her momentary stunned behavior up to his incredible strength.

How anyone could possibly toss the giant Bacterian like he was nothing was just phenomenal. There had to be something non-human about him.

As Chi-Chi held her aching head in her hands, the sound of leaves crunching brought her eyes back up. A doe and a fawn were approaching her slowly, with eyes that indicated they were not what they seemed. The woman scowled and uncrossed her legs.

"How cute, Bambi and his mother. Why don't you two beat it before you get speared?"

"That's not very nice!" The fawn gasped and the duo switched from being deer to the sly little imps Oolong and Puar. The one taking on the appearance of a cat shook a finger at Chi-Chi. "We were just checking in!"

"Yeah," Oolong crossed his arms over his chest when noticing that there was no stinking giant by her side. "He's gonna be pissed off seeing you failed. Where is Bacterian, anyway?"

A sudden appearance of dark green flames caused all three of them to jump. The God of the Underworld glowered at Chi-Chi with burning red eyes. "Yes," he spoke through gritted teeth while sitting down beside her. The closeness of his celestial body next to hers made her sweat. "Where is Bacterian? You didn't kill him, did you?"

Chi-Chi was forced to look at Piccolo when he grabbed her by the chin. He didn't frighten her anymore - she was always on his good side and never crossed him to see the bad - so her voice remained calm with a _sprinkle_ of irritation. "I was in the middle of convincing him to join us when this musclehead came out of nowhere and sent him flying over a mountain! The throw itself probably killed him."

Piccolo's eyes widened as he lowered his hand away from Chi-Chi. Her body was soaked so he knew she had to have gotten into _some_ sort of scuffle and didn't laze out of this as Oolong and Puar would. No mortal being could handle the strength or stench of Bacterian. Whoever it had to be would make a great asset to taking control of Mount Vegetsei. "Did you catch that musclehead's name? Is he still nearby?"

Chi-Chi shrugged her shoulders. "They might be gone already. His little goat friend was saying something about going to Thebes. As for the name, he told me two. His real name is Kakarot but he prefers to be called Goku. How you get Goku from Kakarot, who knows. He thinks he's some sort of dreamboat offering that charming smile and wanting to 'save' me, but I could see through that façade like _that._ "

By the time the woman had snapped her fingers and walked around in circles while venting, Piccolo had steam coming out of his ears and his entire body was on the verge of transforming. At the mention of the name 'Kakarot', Oolong and Puar were backing themselves into a tree and were holding onto one another. It had been almost two decades since they had lied to Piccolo about killing the infant, and they were about to feel his wrath.

"Is this the end?" Puar winced and didn't take his eyes off of Piccolo as the god stalked towards them with a heaving chest.

"Afraid so, buddy." Oolong gulped and the two closed their eyes as Piccolo lifted them up by the scruffs of their necks.

"Well isn't this just so funny!" The God of the Underworld's fangs were sharper than ever while his eye twitched madly. He was bringing the lying imps over to Chi-Chi who was arching an eyebrow. "These two told me they killed Kakarot eighteen years ago and you're here telling me he's alive and well. Which one is it?"

Unsure of what he was going on about, the woman placed her hand on her hip and rolled her eyes. "You really think I'd lie to you with my slavery almost over with? Follow me back to the river and we might catch him so you can see."

She secretly wouldn't mind catching another glimpse, either.

"No," the imps croaked. "Don't go to the river!"

Piccolo growled and kept his grip firm on the treacherous pair while following Chi-Chi through the woods. They paused at a safe distance when a strange group was spotted still by the edge of the water. The God of the Underworld dropped the imps out of shock and they scurried away as quickly as they could. With the messy hair that matched Bardock's to perfection, there was no denying that the armor-clad man standing by that damn green dragon was Kakarot.

"No," Piccolo whispered so harshly that Chi-Chi looked up at him. "No! He's supposed to be dead!"

Chi-Chi slowly brought her eyes back to the man who had interrupted her mission. For the fierce deity to be so fearful of him, there definitely had to be something otherworldly about Goku. "What are you talking about?"

"He's the son of Bardock," Piccolo growled lowly. "Baba predicted Kakarot being the one to cause my downfall. I trusted those two idiots to drain him of immortality and kill him, but of course, they screwed it all up."

"The son of..." Chi-Chi blinked.

Was Piccolo telling her that Goku was not only a god but the son of ancient history's greatest hero?

No wonder he was so hot.

"Wait a minute," Chi-Chi continued while squinting her eyes. Goku splashed water on the goat-legged companion of his playfully and snorted, looking so much like a regular human. "If he's a god, why isn't he on Mount Vegetasei? Where's the glow? Where's the holier-than-thou attitude?"

As irritating as the female's questioning could get, Piccolo realized she had a point. Puar and Oolong must have not given him every single drop of the potion, either. Kakarot may have retained his strength, but that immortality had to have left his body completely for Bardock not to have his pride and joy return to the kingdom. Kakarot could be killed easily, but not by his hands to escape conviction from the King and Queen too early. A wicked smirk accompanied by a cruel chuckle caused Chi-Chi to get nervous.

"What are you thinking now?"

"How's about one last job for you to do before sweet freedom?"

Chi-Chi's eyes lit up but didn't stray from the god's evil face. "Do I have your word?"

"A hundred percent. The planets will be aligning any day now and if you do this one last favor for me, I won't be needing you anymore anyway."

The woman inhaled and exhaled slowly. If Piccolo's dreams of conquering the universe came to fruition, she was strangely comforted by his promise that he wouldn't make her suffer like the rest of the world. "Alright. What do you want me to do?"

Piccolo looked her body up and down, maintaining his smirk. He may not experience the same emotions that men did, but he was very familiar with how their judgments were altered when a beautiful woman was involved. "Join him on his little journey to Thebes. Lay on all that charm of yours and convince him to go to the coliseum. I'll have something waiting there for him."

Chi-Chi frowned and took another glance at Goku. His smile could be seen a mile away. Did she really want to bring harm to someone so sweet?

Sensing her indecisiveness kicking in, Piccolo leaned down and whispered in her ear. "Your soul will belong to you again."

Gulping, Chi-Chi found herself nodding her head.

"Count me in."

* * *

"Will ya stop splashing me!?" King Kai groaned while rubbing his eyes. "That water was tainted by that stinking beast and now you're trying to make me go blind!"

Goku laughed even harder when Shenron used his tail to get King Kai again. "Okay, okay, that's enough!" He was holding his aching side while standing upright. "Leave him alone. We really should get going. Pops is counting on me."

King Kai sniffed and smoothed his fur down as he found a smile. That little bout he had with that temptress turned out to be nothing at all, and he was thankful the hero had his mind back on becoming a god.

"Alright, let's-"

"Oh, Goku!"

King Kai froze hearing that feminine voice and chanced a look at Kakarot. The fool had that lovesick appearance in his eyes again while lifting a hand up to wave at the woman emerging from the trees. He rolled his eyes when she pretended to trip and fell into his chest. The broad even had the stones to start rubbing his pecs with one of her fingers.

"Goku," she repeated again while pouting her lips. "I went to retrieve my boat to leave here and I think that giant destroyed it before you got here. I heard you mention you're headed to Thebes. Mind taking a lady along with you?"

"Absolutely not!" King Kai growled but was ignored when Goku used his hand that wasn't on the woman's back to gently push his forehead out of the way.

"There's only one problem," the wanna-be-hero sighed out with a grin. "I need to know your name."

"It's Chi-Chi," she smiled back and trailed her fingers up his chest. "Can I join you?"

Despite the furious noises of protest coming from down below, Goku found himself nodding his head and reluctantly releasing her. He motioned her over to Shenron who had been waiting patiently for take-off. When he looked over at Chi-Chi, he chuckled at her nervous expression.

"You ever rode a dragon before?"

"Not one as big as this," she muttered and then feigned a smile again. "Is there a special way of doing it?"

"Nah. It's pretty simple." Goku left her and straddled himself onto Shenron. His large hands gripped the green scales of the dragon and before he could tell Chi-Chi to join in from behind, King Kai bolted ahead and beat her to his rightful spot.

"Kakarot!" He hissed while Goku looked over his shoulder at him. "What the heck do you think you're doing!? Can't you tell what she is!?"

The son of Bardock brought his gaze back to Chi-Chi, who was standing patiently and batting her long eyelashes. "A very pretty girl?"

"No! A femme fatale! The hero's downfall! She's exactly like Lazuli, one of Vegeta's sirens that ate the old man lost at sea!"

Goku frowned while King Kai continued to rant. Chi-Chi didn't appear to have a mean bone in her body or a mouth full of sharp teeth. Well, he hadn't had that chance to explore her mouth yet but he assumed what she had was normal.

"You're way too suspicious, King Kai. It's not a good way to live."

"And you're too trusting!"

Knowing he was wrong, Goku shook his head and found a grin just for the woman in purple again. "Since King Kai took the back, you can come sit up in the front. Don't worry, I'll hold onto you nice and tight."

With a blush on her face, Chi-Chi got into a similar position as Goku and held onto Shenron's scales. She gasped slightly when she felt his large arms wrapping around her torso and his body pressed against her back.

"Are you comfortable?" He whispered into her neck so hotly it made her bite her lip. When all she could do was nod, Goku pulled his mouth away. "Good. It's going to be a long ride."

* * *

As they traveled high above the glimmering sea, Chi-Chi marveled at the creatures jumping in and out of the water. The teal-skinned satyr had been snoring after falling asleep an hour ago. Goku and herself were the only ones up and alert now. Figuring this was a good time to pull some information out of him, Chi-Chi risked letting go of Shenron's scales to massage the strong forearms that were holding onto her.

"So why are you on your way to Thebes?"

"I need to perform twelve heroic deeds!"

"...Just for fun, or...?"

"Now that's a secret," Goku winked and decided to ask her questions for the sake of easing his trainer's mind. "What do you have waiting for you in Thebes?"

"Home," Chi-Chi lied but said simply. She didn't like the way he was trying to pick her brain and turned her head around. Both of their faces turned a deep crimson when their lips were practically touching. "Wh-Why were you so close to my head?"

"I dunno," Goku stammered out while sweat formed on his eyebrows. "How come you're looking at my lips?"

Growing increasingly flustered, Chi-Chi was beginning to worry that she'd end up failing Piccolo once again when it came to this man. He definitely was innocent compared to others that had approached her in the past, but he still gave her the impression that he was up to no good himself.

When a strange whale call had frightened Shenron, the dragon jolted in the air and caused turbulence. It awakened King Kai just in time for him to hold onto the dragon tightly, but Goku and Chi-Chi weren't so lucky.

With their hands on each other instead of the scales, the two were sent hurtling down into the ocean. They screamed until they went straight through the water and towards the sandy floor. Holding onto each other while struggling to swim back to the surface, their self-rescue was interrupted by a glowing light. Releasing the only air they had, Goku and Chi-Chi screamed bubbles out silently as a scowling figure approached them with his trident.

The weapon shone on his face briefly to reveal flamed-hair that flowered softly in the water. The sharp ends of the trident came into contact with Goku's bottom and they were sent upward. Shenron noticed the sopping, screaming pair and intercepted them in mid-air. King Kai stared at their panting bodies as they laid on their stomachs, hanging over the side of the dragon and spitting up water.

The satyr saw the marks on Goku's armor and glanced down at the ocean to see only the widow's peak of the Sea God.

"Thanks, Vegeta! He needed that!"

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Action-packed fun coming up next chapter! Goku battles his first real threat and Chi-Chi's feelings grow stronger when he shares his story. Hope you're enjoying this as much as I am writing it <3


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